UPDATE AS OF 10/26/2014- more LINKS for you guys to read...
I had no idea when I first wrote a post about the disappearance of Elisa Lam that other souls from all corners of the globe captivated by her innocent smile, youthful sense of adventure, troubling back story and mysterious and haunting death would find their way here to my lowly blog.
I have been honored by the passion and concern that every reader who has come here has shown towards Elisa herself.
I wish upon a million nickels in a well, that Elisa could have known in her young troubled life, that she possessed something so enthralling and ethereal that in her death she would haunt the souls, hearts and minds of complete strangers for years all because of the strange and mysterious end of her young life.
If only she could have known how special she was.
Here are some links to several articles I have found posted in 2014, since I last posted my update last year, 2013. ( please let me know if a link does not work)
UPDATE AS OF 6/20/2013- CORONER SAYS BIPOLAR DISORDER CONTRIBUTED TO ACCIDENTAL DROWNING from website LAIST.COM
I still just find it hard to wrap my mind around not necessarily WHY Elisa possibly decided to head up to the roof of the Cecil Hotel, but more HOW would she have known how to make her way onto the roof and up the steps and lift the lid of a large water tank and climb in? I believe if she truly did place herself into that water tank with no assistance from anyone, then I believe she was fearful of someone ( real or imagined) and in her frail mental state saw the tank as a good hiding place. I just still SMH......
The coroner's office has released its long-awaited report on Elisa Lam, a 21-year-old Canadian tourist whose body was found in the water tank of the Cecil Hotel downtown weeks after she went missing.
The report ruled her death an accidental drowning, and also listed her bipolar disorder as a significant condition,according to the Los Angeles Times. However, it did not elaborate exactly how it may have contributed to her death.
In his autopsy, coroner Ed Winter noted that her death was considered "suspicious" due to her age and health. She was last seen a few weeks before her body was discovered acting bizarrely in the hotel where she was staying. Surveillance footage captured her at the elevator in the Cecil Hotel downtown. She pressed all the buttons, ducked in and out and acted like she was hiding from someone. That video plus her disappearance sparked all sorts of conspiracy theories.
UPDATE ADDED AS OF 3/5- Elisa on her tumblr blog, wrote the quoted post below about her depression and the drugs her psychiastrist had prescribed for her ( see pic)
"Adventures in hypomania Part II
I have been hypomanic since Tuesday.
I HAVE TO GET SOME SLEEP OR I WILL CRASH
and I am so scared of how big of a crash this one will be.
How do I know this is might become THE BIG ONE? My memory is super compromised on present things right now.
It’s just….I understand everything completely. Fellow bipolars, you may be the only ones who will understand what this is like. With absolute clarity, I understand the universe. My mind isn’t just blown, it’s the hindenburg + hiroshima + nagasaki + san francisco earthquake + a rock concert where the music is so loud your eardrums are bleeding
Like the equivalent of when humans discovered fire but not as big as the Big Bang
And that’s why someone said (see memory fail right here) :
**** QUICK GET ME PEN AND PAPER I MUST WRITE THIS DOWN BEFORE I FORGET THIS IDEA WILL NEVER RE-EMERGE BECAUSE MY MEMORY IS FAILING*
ergo my brain is saying :
“I HAVE SO MUCH **** TO DO BECAUSE I HAVE TO TELL PEOPLE SLEEPING IS USELESS WHY ARE YOU BLOODY SLEEPING THAT’S SUCH A WASTE OF TIME THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT YOU HAVE FINALLY CONNECTED THE DOTS AND YOU’RE GOING TO LET IT SLIP AWAY **** I BET IF YOU WROTE THE WHOLE THING DOWN YOU COULD GET A FREAKIN NOBEL PEACE PRIZE IN ALL THE BLOODY CATEGORIES GAWD WHY HAVEN’T WE EVOLVED TO NOT NEED SLEEP LIKE WE HAVE **** TO DO AND LIMITED TIME AND MOST OF IT IS SPENT LYING DOWN JUST BREATHING I MEAN I CAN DO ALL THE LYING DOWN I NEED WHEN I’M DEAD (but not breathing) BREATHING IS SO FREAKIN OVERRATED I SHOULD BE ABLE TO EXIST IN SPACE IN A VACCUM I MEAN IF THE BLOODY MOON CAN DO IT WHY CAN’T I THE MOON IS JUST MADE OF CHEESE ANYWAYS HOLY ****ING **** TWAT MOTHER****ER MERDE TABERNACLE AI YAAAAAAAA I HAVE NEVER SWORN SO MUCH BECAUSE I ‘WASTED’ 4 YEARS AND IT HAS CULMINATED INTO THIS ONE POINT AND YOU ARE PROBABLY NOT GOING TO REMEMBER ALL OF IT TOMORROW LIKE ****ING HELL SOME PEOPLE HAVE TO DEVOTE THEIR WHOLE LIVES TO GET A PHD IN ORDER TO MAKE A DISCOVERY THAT ADDS THIS TINY LITTLE INFITISIMAL SPECK IN PROGRESS AND YOU HAVE FIGURED OUT EVERY BLOODY THING IN THE SPAN OF 48 HOURS
and that is why another someone (memory fail #1291) said:
You either get it down on paper or you go crazy
tl;dr I need to learn shorthand"
quote and photo source: http://nouvelle-nouveau.tumblr.com/post/22304102762/more-its-still-odd-to-me-that-people-are-so
The story of a young Canadian university student, ELISA LAM, visiting a foreign country by herself and hop scotching across various large and busy cities taking in the sights and sounds alone reminded me of myself right after I graduated college.
Fearless, excited, open to traveling to new and different places, meeting new people and trying new things all while having no one but myself and my enthusiasm. Such is the beauty of being young and feeling the world is your oyster and there is so much to see and do, wherever do you begin?
another Chinese website posting previous Facebook posts where Elisa herself uses the words" RECKLESS & IMPULSIVE", she talks about introducing herself to some guy she doesn't know in San Diego...
UPDATE- THIS IS ALLEGEDLY ELISA'S BLOG PAGE:
and you can read in her posts that she was not feeling well mentally or emotionally--
"I spent about two days in bed hating myself.
Why don't I simply do the things that I know will make me feel better?It isn't rocket science. It isn't that difficult. Get out of bed. Eat. See people. Talk to people. Exercise. Write. Read. "
"Things are going fairly well in that I am leaving the house and got myself a part time job. My room is still a mess. I haven't actually done any school work and I berate myself for being such a lazy person."
"I feel I am wasting my time compared to my fellow peers. I had a relapse at the start of the term and had to drop 2 of the 3 courses I was taking. Now I am down to one course and I have missed 3 weeks of classes since my sleeping pattern is completely reversed."
"I haven't felt 'fine' in over 3 years. This relapse makes me feel as though I haven't made any progress at all."
"I'm very disappointed in myself for breaking down during the term forcing me to withdraw from courses. I've been at university for 3 years and I've only managed to complete three courses. That means I've been a first year for three years and this September it will be for the fourth year because I require 30 credits in order for second year status."
"I just wish...someone around me could understand what it really means to be depressed."
"Bless the internet. All those who wish to find a way to express their sadness can go there and feel less alone. So many of the tumblrs I follow seem to carry the same grief as me in some way or another. . . . I simply have no motivation to do anything, let alone leave my bed. My computer and the internet is my one lifeline, one link to the world and reminder to look beyond my immediate situation because there is always more. Always. "
"On one hand this helps me deal with the sadness but on the other hand I basically become a potato. On the outside I look like a catatonic hobo on my bed in front of a glowing screen (no sleep schedule whatsoever but this appears to be a norm for the jobless and the people on the internet) and not eating/sleeping/functioning like any "normal" person. And I shout at anyone saying "Maybe.... you should try getting off the computer?" Leave me alone, I'm happy, this makes me feel better, I need this, this is the one thing that makes me sane, I can't deal with people, just leave me alone, this is something I can actually do, nobody is judging me, I feel less lonely because all these people think like me. "
". . . despite the overwhelming majority of tumblr-ers who seem to be your soulmate, the actuality is they are the minority of the world. And perhaps, they only exist on their computers and they are a muted version of their online selves in real life. And maybe I'm looking at them through the rose-coloured glasses (pixelated screens I think there's a funny analogy in there somewhere) and seeing the person they aspire to be."AND THIS IS HER TUMBLR
and her photos of beautiful things and moments from her quirky life:
UNSURE WHAT EXACT DATE IN JANUARY ELISA POSTED THIS:
"So obviously I hate them. As a friend said, you’re 21, an adult, you can legally leave and go anywhere. I need to find a place to go. The first time I left the house, I was unprepared and I came back with so much emotional luggage. I always thought I could take care of myself but turns out I’m not capable of that. Even living in residence I didn’t handle it well. Not the cleaning up and cooking (yes cooking) but having to go out into the world alone."
DID ELISA POST THIS ON JAN 9? "I really need to be removed from society before my big mouth gets me in trouble and I get beaten up. "
More pics from inside the skeezy CECIL HOTEL in downtown Los Angeles HERE